We had to book a holiday, but we were sick o'whitley bay
We fancied the mediterranean.
All the vacancies had gone, that's all the vacancies but one
A vacancy for which we didn't plan.

What could we do? we could hitch, a ride back home from moskvitch
We had to stay & face the cost & sunbathe in the russian frost.

Chorus:
One one one one night in moscow, & we'll be russian home
One one one one night in moscow
I'll be russian, you'll be russian, we'll all be russian home

The brochure said it's nice & warm, you need no russian uniform
We had the flu & caught a russian cough,
No fish n'chips or decent pubs, we called the hotel wormwood scrubs
We said we would complain to gorbochof.

We couldn't find a disco anywhere, no mcdonalds or a wimpy in red square
We must have been potty to have gone to the soviet union.

Chorus

For a pint & coronation street...russian home
A bacon sarny & as much as we can eat

Russian home...(guitar bit)