He's a friend you can depend on for a smile,
Everyday or even just once in a while.
The man, we sung about in the van.
All the girls agree that he is pretty sweet.
Got a ticket once for pissing in the street,
But he just really needed to pee.

If I could I would take his face and make it famous,
He's a real celebrity…or at least he is to me.

He wore a Megadeth shirt, He went with me to concerts,
He had a beat up blue car, gave me rides to practice, then he got a new car
I met him in the sixth grade, in Webster I was afraid,
Cause once he said to me "run" and when I started running he shot me with a BB gun.

He's my only friend that I am taller than.
Yet everyday he takes a Flinstone's vitamin,
He says, his favorite ones are the red.
He's a friend and a musician and a ref,
Listens to heavy music loud and one day he'll be deaf,
Oh well….he won't need hearing in hell.

If I could I would take his face and make it famous,
He's a real celebrity…or at least he is to me.

He wore a Megadeth shirt, He went with me to concerts,
He had a beat up blue car, gave me rides to practice, then he got a new car.
I met him in the sixth grade, in Webster I was afraid,
Cause once he said to me "run" and when I started running he shot me with a BB gun.

If I could I would take his face and make it famous,
He's a real celebrity and he gets into the shows for free.
He's a friend like a friend should be.

Plays bass in a band and he hangs out with the Shrimpman,
Drinks until he's silly every single Friday at Tequila Willie's.
If you're looking for a good time you can find him online.
Ask me for his screen name.
And so ends my shout out to my very good friend Dane.