Woke up one morning I was really depressed
That kinda day when gettin dressed
Is like the hardest fuckin thing that you could ever imagine
Suckin hard yeah I was cold tragin

So I tried to make myself feel better
Called up my friend Kim and then I met her
Cuz she always makes me feel just a little bit stronger
And I needed advice, wonder if I was wrong for
Splittin with my baby it was almost two years
Which is a lot you know in dog years!

But anyway, I wrote enough songs about him in our day
So I'm gonna stop now and put it away in the back of my brain
And tell you bout the other shit I have to complain about that day
Picked up the guitar tried to play
Couldn't get past the chord A
And E and C and fuck it was boring

All of a sudden there's a knock at the door and it was my old neighbor
Who wakes me up every mornin 7:30 am
Ridin her exercycle blastin Lite FM
But she tells me I gotta keep it down
I give up, I'm so down

I hate where I be livin on Clinton Street
The other day I saw a dead guy lyin under a sheet
And these 14 year old pushers tryin to sell me dope
And the fuckin salsa music I can't even cope

I used to really love livin on the Lower East Side
But when I walk down the street, "Yo Pussy need a ride?"
Is what I hear from every mac muthafucker givin hassles
Yo Punk I ain't a stripper, you see some tassles?

Crawlin all over the apartment are cockroaches and moths
And my ex-boyfriend says I act like David Lee Roth
All these record labels calling but they don't produce the cash
Yo boy shave that goatee and uh then call me back
I'm working 2 different jobs and I'm always fuckin broke
Eatin tofu everyday and uh maybe a coke
Feelin down feelin bad feelin slow like a turtle
C'mon get me off the mike because I'm frontin like Urkel