If you wanna see evil tonight at its best
We're the cruelest of people, put us to the test
If you're looking for heinous and iniquitous acts
Ethics cannot contain us, sit back and relax
One of these cads will be our villainous star
So without further ado, here they are!

(I'm Rodney and I'm from the great state of South Dakota
Home of beautiful Mount Rushmore
For now!)

(I'm Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz
And I like unicorns and rainbow
Wait who switched my?)

(Haha!)

(Errrr)

(I'm Dr. Diminutive and I don't have a Napoleon complex
Napoleon had a me complex!
Don't cross me!)

Of course, the L -O -V -E -M -U -F -F -I -N by-laws which govern us all
Say to enter this pageant you must be this tall
So disqualified!
(You can't do that!)
Yes, we can!
(Why?)

'Cause we're evil!
Evil!
Evil tonight!