Sometimes a man and a woman spends thirty or forty years together
And they don't belong together
And then one day, one of them tries to leave
And does but in a most peculiar way

Woman, one of these days I'm (leaving)
Leaving you far behind
And on that day you'll be (grieving)
Grieve on, woman, I don't mind

Look out in the backyard (mama)
'Cause I'm leaving you real soon
Gonna fly me up to (heaven)
In my big red balloon

You're nothing but an old fool
And that's all you'll ever be
You're nothing but an old fool
You know you'll never beat me
So stop your silly playing

It's time you settled down
And hear me when I'm saying
You'll never get that damn thing off the ground
Old women are ya (looking)

'Cause I'm almost ten feet high, high, high
Woman, stop your (cooking)
'Cause I'll never eat that pie

I'm on my way to (heaven)
Might even touch the Moon
Wave me goodbye, I'm (leaving)
In my big red balloon

You're nothing but an old fool
And that's all you'll ever be
You're nothing but an old fool
You know you'll never leave me

So stop your silly playing
It's time you settled down
You better hear me when I'm saying
You'll never get that damn thing off the ground

You never gave me (loving)
You never were the kind
You never gave me (children)
You never had the time

Remember me to (no one)
I was born this afternoon
I got it all (together)
In my big red balloon

You're nothing but an old fool
And that's all you'll ever be
You're nothing but an old fool

You know you'll never leave me
So come on and stop this silly playing
It's time you settled down
And hear me when I'm saying

You'll never get that damn thing off the ground
You'll never get that damn thing off the ground
I said you won't get that thing off the ground

Get that
What are you doing up there?
Bring that damn thing back down here
Listen, you hear me
Get back down here boy