I wish I had button eyes and red fat nose
Shaggy cotton skin and just one set of clothes
Sittin' on the shelf in the local department store
With no dreams to dream and nothing to be sorry for
I wish I was a Teddy Bear not living nor loving nor going nowhere
I wish I was a Teddy Bear and I'm wishin' that I hadn't fallen in love with you

I wish I had a wooden heart and a sawdust mind
Then your mem'ry wouldn't come around to hurt all the time
I'd have a sewed on smile and a painted twinkle in my eye
And I never would've ever had to learn how to cry
I wish I was a Teddy Bear...

I wish I had a string you'd pull to make me stay hi there I'm Teddy it's a lovely day
Then I'd know everytime I spoke the words were right
And no one would know the mess that I made of my life
I wish I was a Teddy Bear...
And I'm wishin' that I hadn't fallen in love with you