Long ago just you and me
But you traded up to eat eat eat
Packing on those Kilograms
Aren't Kilograms just like pounds?
That keester is sure filling out
You could use a walk about!

I'd like to tell you tastefully
Your ass is an enormity

Freaky hanas' get me off
But how can I, Jack off
Did you know that you wears
Size 16 underwears
You joined a gym
And that rhymes with slim
Bulimia at your own pace
It must be an acquired taste

Well I could tell you tastefully
Your ass is an enormity
(That's big, that's a big ass)

Newport girls act with haste
Tie that sweatshirt 'round your waist
I'd like to tell you tastefully
Your ass is an enormity!

In Newport beach you have the class
and money stuffed way up your ass
I think that I will have to pass
Tie that sweatshirt 'round your god damned fat ass!