Each bell would peal with a silvery zeal
As the holiday feeling was filling us.
But now instead, all we're feeling is dread
Because christmastime is killing us!

Each christmas list gets us more and more pissed
Till the thought of existence is chilling us.

I'll tell you what. Shove your list up your butt, because...

Christmastime is killing us!

But can't you see that what you do
Is a dream come true?
Can't you see that every smile
Makes it all worthwhile?

No, screw you! It's all but through,
There's too much to do.
All those dreams are nightmares
And blank icy stares.
Each little elf used to fill up a shelf
Making playthings and selflessly thrilling us.
Now they're on crack and it feels like iraq
Because christmastime is killing us!

Each model train only heightens the pain
Of the workload that's straining and drilling us.

Fingers all bleed! And look! that guy just peed
Because christmastime is killing us!

But can't you see our point of view?
We rely on you.
Can't you see that christmas cheer
Gets us through the year?

My whole crew is black and blue.
Can't you take a clue?
You may think I look great,
But I'm twenty-eight!

Each jingle-bell is a requiem knell,
And while you think it's swell, we are toiling in hell!

Take a look, you can tell, as a man, I'm a shell!

Because christmastime is killing us!
Killing us!
Christmastime is killing us!