I've got bad news baby, and you're the first to know
Yes I've got bad news baby, and you're the first to know
Well I discovered this morning that my wig is about to blow

Well I've been rocking on my feet and I've been talking all out of my head
Yes I've been rocking on my feet and I've been talking all out of my head
And when I get through talking, I can't remember a thing I've said

Now I used to be a sharpie
All dressed in the latest styles
But now I'm walking down Broadway
Wearing nothing but a smile
I see all kinds of little men
Although they're never there
I tried to push a subway train
And poured whiskey in my hair
I'm a gal who blew a fuse, I've got those blowtop blues

Last night I was five feet tall, Today I'm eight feet ten
Every time I fall downstairs, I float right up again
When someone turned the lights on me it like to drove me blind
I woke up this morning in Bellevue but I've left my mind behind
I'm a gal you can't excuse, cause I've got those blowtop blues

Well I got high last night, and I took my man to his wife's front door
Yes I got juiced last night and I took my man to his wife's front door
Oh but she was a 45-packin' mama, and I ain't goin' to try that no more!