From the Bowery to Brighton you've all heard my call / I've got two pierced nipples and a ring through my balls / My name is Slackerman, superhero for the masses / I'm trying to rid society from the rich upper classes / I've got sideburns like Elvis and a shaggy goatee / I was born in 73 / Most superheros fly high, but me, I'd rather skate / Both parents are lawyers, divorced when I was eight / My wallets got a chain and superpowers to boot / I'll lasso you like a cowboy then I'll die your hair blue / I'm studying psych at the local JC / Cuz I don't really know what to be / My partner in slackdom is a chick named Danielle / I met her at the drive thru of taco bell / She drives her mom's green Volvo, bag of tricks on her back / She wears her hair short, wears her Doc Martens black / With her Maybelline lips and her Catholic school skirt / She'll leave bankers with nothing but dirt / Its a thankless job being a hero and all / But I've gotta do it or GenX will fall / Yuppies and Boomers get outta my way / Cuz I'm taking over and I start today / I am the twenty-something / Hero of the world and I am here for your mocha